Friday, August 12, 2016
A Letter to My Nieces Who Are Starting College....and Anyone Else Who's Navigating a Big Change
Dearest Change Embarkers,
I've been thinking about you a lot lately. I can remember what it was like when I left for college as a transfer student and no one warned me about all the things I would feel. Oh, the feelings. So very, very many of them.
I remember thinking I hadn't ever cried so much in my life as I did those first six months of living away from home. There was so much uncertainty—would things ever feel comfortable again? would friends ever feel as close as the ones I'd grown up with? was my boyfriend being faithful? did the people at home miss me as much as I missed them?
The worry and the sadness and the stress that come with big changes are kind of a given. But even when you know they're coming, they can flatten you like an avalanche. It's hard to be prepared.
And this is the thing that no one tells you: Feeling all those hard feelings—the growing pains that stretch the limits of what you've ever had to endure in the past—it means you're LIVING.
When the hurt feels deeper than maybe it ever has before—that means you're having a deeper human experience.
All that crying and worrying and wondering? It's a gift.
You're being given the gift of depth and breadth. The gift of a life that is more intense than some other people will ever experience. You're being given the chance to explore the spectrum of your own emotions.
And I promise that with those low lows will come high highs.
So if I could send you on your way with one little nugget of knowledge, it would be that.
That the sadness you're inevitably going to feel is an amazing opportunity in disguise. A chance to push the boundaries of yourself and your emotions.
So if you can, be a little grateful for it.
I guarantee that down the line, when you're looking back on this time, you'll view it with fondness and nostalgia. Not only because you'll have made it through—but because you were fortunate to have experienced it at all.
Love you lots and am sending all my good vibes with you as you set out on your journey.
Go live your great, big life. It's going to be amazing.