My Story

Melissa Maris
What should you know about me? I'm a third-generation Southern Californian. A child of the 70s. An avid hiker. A writer and crafter. A wife and a friend. A lover of positivity. My battle scars include being laid off twice, nearly going broke, being broken up with multiple times, and being colossally cheated on.

And you know what? 
I'm SO grateful for the hard stuff because it led me right to the life I'm living today.

We all have choices about the paths our stories will lead us down, and I choose to try and take mine down the path of joy—even when everything seems to suck.

When I was a senior in high school, my English Literature teacher made each of us give a speech on our "philosophy" on life. Mine was simply "To Laugh." 

Joy and laughter have always been paramount in my life, and I've always had an irrepressible yearning to help other people tap into them, too.

I have a BS in Communications and have been working as an advertising copywriter since the late 1990s. I know firsthand that the way you tell a story can make or break your success. Choosing to see yourself as the victor instead of the victim can transform everything.

So how'd I decide to become a coach?

Throughout my 20s and early 30s, I found myself caught in a spin cycle of relationships I knew weren't right. Despite that knowing, I tried to force fit each of them into my life. And I ended up getting my heart broken over and over. The icing on the heartbreak cake came when a man I had been living with cheated on me with an ex and found out he might have a baby from the affair.

As Elizabeth Lesser would say, it broke me open.

It was a huge lesson in trusting my gut. One of the most valuable lessons I'll ever learn. I had a great therapist at the time, and had been doing quite a bit of exploration around personal development and spirituality. With a fresh desire to be true to myself and find the kind of relationship I really wanted, I started paying very close attention to the way I was viewing, treating, and speaking to and about myself. I realized that the stories coming into my head and out of my mouth were shaping my relationships and my entire life.

I made a commitment to stay attuned to my gut instincts and focus on following right fit feelings while heeding red flags. Just 4 months after my break up/wake up, I met the man who would become my husband. And he was everything I could have ever hoped to manifest in a man.

In March of 2011 my Mr. W and I married, and we've been going strong ever since.

And here's the thing: I know without a doubt that if I can find love and happiness, so can you. I feel so passionately about helping women tune into their intuition to find the love they desire and the joy they deserve, that I also decided to go through Martha Beck's training program to become a life coach.

Now I help women get unstuck—whether that means jumping into the dating pool, initiating a break-up, finding the way out of overwhelm, or getting clear on what feels like the next most delicious step to take in life.  

I feel so fortunate to get to work with such amazing people and watch their transformations. Their learning, laughter, tears, and epiphanies fill my heart to the brim. And as I help clients navigate their paths to wonderful, I continue to traverse my own with my Mr. W at my side.  

You can read about our adventures in California's central coast wine country on my personal blog, 'S Wonderful. And if you'd like a recap of how our paths collided, you can find it in the first several posts on this site.

If you'd like to work with me, or you have any questions about my coaching or philosophies (or you just want some winery recommendations in the Santa Ynez Valley) please don't hesitate to contact me here. 

Much love!